Glimpses

Thursday, January 12, 2012

Outside In - Bathtime


Outside In is the working title of a story in process. If you are peeking in for the first time, you might want to catch up on the rest of the story before reading this part... it will make better sense to you. For convenience I have added a page with the links from the beginning to this point. I will continue to add them as the story continues to grow. 


(In chronological order - Outside In)



The water was very warm, he liked it that way. He lowered himself under so that only his face was above the skin. He listened to the sound of his heartbeat thumping steadily from the inside out. With  his eyes closed, he could see his Momma at her drawing table, in the dim light of the cabin. A small swivel light was anchored to the slab of wood she hung at an angle from the ceiling. Her face was back-lit in such a way that it formed a halo around the thick, dark curls piled atop her head. Blake remembered her that way: she was an angel to him. 

"Are you a prune yet?" Torie asked as she came into the bathroom, and picked up one of his water-wrinkled hands. "Oh, my you have become a prune" she teased. "It's time to get out, get your pajamas on and get into bed."

"Can I stay a little more?" he asked knowing that the prune status was sure to earn a no from his aunt. 

"No, but you can take another one tomorrow!" she smiled as she helped him out of the tub and wrapped the towel around him. "Be sure to dry between your toes." 

He wondered what was so important about his toes that she always told him that, but he did it anyway. His pajamas were covered in red cars, and about 3 inches too short, but he wore them to bed every night that they weren't in the wash. His Momma made them for him just before she left, and he believed she would be back before he grew out of them.

12 comments:

  1. I am missing Momma for him. Bless his heart. This is really good.

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    1. Oh thank you Jo, I am really enjoying watching (that's what it feels like to me) the story grow. It's like he's showing me his life...

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  2. ~smilin'~
    Arrivin' late to your story...but catchin' up with a story that is happenin' for the writer as well as the readers is truly intriguin'...Leave it to you to be sharin' a story from outside the box even when we are all within...count me IN!

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    1. Ah thank you shadowoman... I am glad you arrived, no matter the timing.

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  3. I love this little guy and I look forward to each installment.

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    1. Diva, thank you for telling me so. This is the first time I have done a story this way. It's odd to me, to make it public while it is really in the drafting stages, but it's also good for me to see what people are enjoying about it, as I go... audience driven, character driven... either way it is a new challenge, a bit intimidating, and exciting all at once! :-) Thank you for being a part of the process!

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  4. It looks like it is developing into a sweet/sad story. Looking forward to more segments.

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    1. Thank you, my goal is to write some of it every day. :-)

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  5. what is it about a mamma that makes us sad when she's not around?

    talk about writing with heart, k. great job!

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    1. d~ I'm not sure, but I can feel it from him.

      If I knew how to put one of those cute little ascii hearts in here for you I would, but I don't know how... grinZ, so you will have to use your imagination! Thank you for the continued support, and encouragement.

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  6. I'm really enjoying following this story. You have a wonderful way of bringing your characters to light and your installments are the perfect length for blogs. They're long enough to move the story along and not so long as to become difficult to commit to reading on a consistent basis.

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    1. :-) Yay! Because this is a new process for me, it's important to me that I find that kind of balance. You have so much experience with bloggers, and blogging that it nice to see that I have achieved that kind of balance, thus far. Thank you Beth!

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I appreciate your comments, and constructive criticism is welcome!

“To bring anything into your life, imagine that it's already there.”

- Richard Bach

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