Glimpses

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

Lillie Remains


Here's a twisty take on the 100 Word Song Challenge that Lance puts together each Tuesday for us to write about. If you have never tried it before give it a go! This weeks song is Of Lillies & Remains by Bauhaus




Here's my take:

Lillie's long, black hair was as shiny as the metal pole beside her bed, and her eyes were as still as the untouched water beside her head, but she could see it all.

"This doesn't make sense" she said.

"How did I get here?" It seemed surreal when just a few moments ago she was in her bright, red Charger on her way to her sister's wedding.

"Where is everyone?"

An airy form of her former self shook her own arm.

"Wake up!" she said as she shook it again. "You have to get up, we have things to do."

22 comments:

  1. very twisty!

    I like the mystery and details. well done.

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    1. Thank you Lance. (still contemplating hehehhe)

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  2. I love all the color and confusion - perfect take!

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    1. :-) Thank you T... there is something in this one that is unsettled to me, like the rough draft of something you know you will like, but are not quite there with yet. Maybe I just need to keep going with it. :-)

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  3. It's not her time. She better listen to herself.

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  4. oooh, an out of body experience? Nice!

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    1. Yes, she hasn't quite figured that out yet;-)

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    1. Thank you Tara, I may keep it growing through the 100 Word Song Challenges... we shall see what becomes of the next:-)

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  6. This is very "twisty" and mysterious. Great take!

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    1. Thanks for dipping into the pool Mags :-)

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  7. Oooo! You hit one out with this! You took me on a visual journey as you chose color to signify important elements of the story. I also like your description of the piece as twisty. Apt for sure.

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    1. Well thank you Debbie :-) I like playing with the 100 Word Song challenges, they are very often uniquely inspiring.

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  8. hmmm. i got all distracted by the pole. wait, what? ;)

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  9. I got distracted by the pole, too. But I agree with Eric. She'd better listen!

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  10. I liked the "hair as shiny and black as pole", her "eyes as still as the water"

    creepy and scary and Really good. I am scared but interested. BWAAHHHHH!

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    1. Thank you Kir. If you scared AND interested, you will fit right in with the rest of us.

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I appreciate your comments, and constructive criticism is welcome!

“To bring anything into your life, imagine that it's already there.”

- Richard Bach

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